MY BELOVED

MY BELOVED by Jan Karon

You will want to read the other books in the series to really appreciate the depth of this one.

It's 6:30 in the morning, and I have just closed the cover on Jan Karon's newest Mitford book, My Beloved. I have loved this series so much, but this book has rocked me to my core in a way that the other volumes never did. It is raw and filled with transparent emotion. Everyone is getting older and we are presented with the ultimate question of what do people truly desire when they know they are in the final years of their lives? What's truly meaningful in their relationships with their spouses, their children, their neighbors? It is absolute melodious beauty to read but coupled with sadness as we realize that every day left is a gift. Oh to grab a hold of that in our younger years!

Coupled with that is the realization of responsibility that Dooley and Lace have in their lives. Committed to each other, their children, and Meadowgate Farm, it's not always easy to see how things will come together. But God provides, just as He does in our own lives, and they hang on to that with every part of their being. After all, look at how faithful God has been in their lives to this point.

We also become privy to Cynthia's story during the time she walked away from her husband (who was having affairs and children with other women when it was clear Cynthia could not have children) and the meeting of Father Tim. In the past books, we were given the facts of the matter, but now Karon pulls back the veil and takes us to the point Cynthia tries desperately to get her feet underneath her again only to succumb to the pain leading to the attempt to take her own life. But God wasn't finished with Cynthia, as we well know from the story. He had a plan, and it was still on this side of Heaven.

As if that wasn't enough depth to give us, Karon also plunges us even deeper with the continuing healing that needs to take place among Dooley's siblings and his mother. There are still enormous places of pain between Pauline and her children especially where Sammy is concerned. While it's not realistic for a simple "all is forgiven" to occur and life move on as if the terrible neglect and devaluization of her children never happened, Hope is always present when God is present! Amen?!

Deep. It's easy to see where all this springs from when reading the Author's Notes at the end of the book. Jan Karon talks about the loss of her beautiful daughter to pancreatic cancer. Not long after, her brother passed away from terminal cancer as well. She shares about facing a world that didn't seem to have a lot of meaning in it anymore. She clearly states that she didn't think of ending her own life, but the words are reminiscent of a boat that was lost at sea, left to the battery of the waves. However, just as she shows us through the lives of her characters, God wasn't finished with Jan Karon either. The pain is there. It is acknowledged and felt, but the resounding ribbon of Hope threads it's way through even the most painful of times. All I can say as I wrap this book up is Praise God that everything we experience here is not the end of the story.

HEADS UP- The word a** was used a handful of times. Dooley's sister, Jess, tells him in a private, short conversation that she thinks she may be gay. She says she doesn't know, but she knows she is "different." Dooley's response to her is that all he knows is that he loves her.