BOYS SHOULD BE BOYS - WEEK 10 CHAPTER 11

BOYS SHOULD BE BOYS: 7 SECRETS TO RAISING HEALTHY SONS by Meg Meeker, M.D.

Have you ever stopped to visualize what you hope your son will look like as a man? Not physically, but just as Dr. Meeker talks about, his insides: his integrity, courage, humility, meekness, and kindness. Stop a moment and pull that picture up in your mind. Is your son on the path to accomplishing that picture?

This chapter really gave me a lot to ponder. Starting with am I modeling the character I desire to be in my son?

Virtue. "Parents don't have to construct the virtues and then pour them into the heart of their son. The virtues are there, but in small fragments that must be cleaned, shaped, and polished." Romans 2:15 confirms this thought. God writes His law on the hearts of man. It's up to your son if he is going to act on it, and it's up to us to demonstrate its value.

 Integrity. Can you trust your son? This is so foundational in every area. If you can't trust him then honestly what do you have? There is no solid ground to stand on within the relationship. What a sickening feeling is produced when you realize that the relationship is so fractured that the ability to "shoot straight with each other" isn't there.

Courage. "A boy who does the right thing under pressure knows he can control himself.." What is the outcome of this? Honor and self-respect. This makes me think of a lot of the ads for the military especially for how Marines are portrayed. Our boys need a serious dose of courage to survive in today's world.

Humility. I especially loved this section. Lewis's quote was spot on. When we stereotypically think of humility we picture a doormat. Someone that's weak, head hangs down, etc. Did you notice the strength that resonated with the word humility? If our boy is humble, he knows who he is. He doesn't need someone else to affirm him, and he doesn't need to puff himself up. He's free to think about others. He doesn't crush those around him. BAM That's definitely contrary to the world! I'm going to add that they are comfortable in their own skin.

Meekness. Constrained power. Have you ever thought of meekness in that light before? Again, typically, we have a mental image of a beat down individual. Matthew 5:5 says, "Blessed are the meek for they shall inherit the earth." How can a beat down individual inherit the earth? They can't. The power and energy that make up our boys is not taken away. It's channeled, directed, and controlled. It sustains him. It feeds his drive as he leads, manages, and navigates a volatile world but all under the leadership of his Lord.

Kindness. This word has lost it's meaning in our world today. No longer does it mean to extend care and compassion towards someone. It now means I agree with you in all you say and do. The kindness I desire my son to grow in is the one that extends human dignity and value to all because of the image they are made in, but that does not equate agreeing with all the choices a person makes in their life.

I say I value all these things. I say that they are top priority for my son. Am I treating them as such or am I speaking with no action to back it up? That will be my pondering for the week.